Bad Decisions

We all have bad days and we all make bad decisions.  I, myself, have had bad decades.  I often feel that I walk around with a black cloud over my head like the L’il Abner character Joe Btfsplk, who brings bad luck wherever he goes.

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I invest in stocks the day before the stock market crashes.  I buy land that turns out to have toxic waste under it.  I keep my money in a bank that is NOT too large to fail.  I buy high and sell low.

My friends (friends, HAH!) encourage me to create my own mutual fund – The Curmudgeon-at-Large Fund – so that they can do the opposite of whatever I’m doing.

Whatever line I choose to get in is always the longest and slowest.  The slot machine pays out immediately after I turn it over to someone else.  Like Barney Google, my horses come in three days late.

If I decide to have a benign wart treated, it grows back in the shape of Newt Gingrich’s butt and the dermatologist tells me that it can no longer be removed.

Nevertheless, when I am feeling down, which is most of the time, I remind myself that there are people in this world who have made really, really bad decisions, even worse than any I have made.

I ask you: “What were these people thinking?”

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Now, I don’t feel so bad.  I think I’ll go to the casino and bet it all on 21 red.

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27 responses to “Bad Decisions

  1. Thanks, I feel MUCH better now! (Never realized how stupid some could be!)

  2. Pingback: Are You Playing with a Full Deck? | Curmudgeon at Large

  3. Just another example that everything is relative as compared to what! What were these people thinking???? … they weren’t, but nice horse!

  4. I made invested in a friend’s company. You may fill in the answer as to the wisdom of that decision.

  5. The mostly naked chick walking her horse—I’m not sure what’s a bad decision about that?

    • I’m reaching on that one a bit. The picture came from a series of women displaying themselves nearly nude in defense of animals (good decision).
      It just looks from the picture as though the woman is going to marry the horse (bad decision).

  6. The horse won’t even look at that woman…

  7. Oh. Good. Lord. Some people are idiots.

  8. Wow, thanks. I feel positively competent now. (And I loved L’il Abner and Joe Btfsplk and the gang… and do you remember the schmoos?)

  9. Thank you for this post. The cloud above my head today seems to be less invisible than usual and everybody is commenting on what an ol’ curmudgeon I am being. But now I’m just going to go to the casino and bed it all on 21…black.

  10. Euuu! Thanks for the laugh, Cur … but that lady is going to have some serious chafing riding that horse bare arsed. I’d have to keep my director bloomers on to protect the goods.

  11. Seems I too have had a taste of your dark friend, the cloud. Great read, Thanks!!!

  12. Thank you, Cal. I thought I was having a bad life until I read this post. Now I see that it’s been quite normal and free of facial ink.

  13. We must never meet in person as I have similar luck and we would probably end up self-immolating after getting face tattoos saying “I am aware this was a terrible idea”

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